Well, one more day to go and we gonna say goodbye to 2015! :)
2015's a memorable year for me because:
1. I met my parents after 4.5 years. I was so happy hugging them and then spent a month with them.
2. Lived in a caravan for 6 months. The best part is I spent 1 month with my parents in the caravan which was brilliant.
Life has changed so much. Sometimes I just sit on my own and think about the memories from the past years. How different things are now. The good, the bad, success, failures, happiness and sorrow. I wish I wasn't so stupid to have said or done things which I had in the past and I know nothing can be done about it now. I reflect on the incidents to ensure I am well prepared for the future.
There were times that I felt so lonely in life - far away from family and far from true friends, the stress of work and losing motivation to cook a meal alone for just myself cause I always enjoy cooking for people around me and there is happiness to watch them enjoy the dishes I cooked. On some days the heart aches for not being able to receive enough warmth, love, care and affection cause you got nobody around you who is close to heart similar as family or those friends who are genuine and true - who live thousands of miles away. I do talk enough on phone, whatsapp, skype, etc, but nothing will ever feel like a real hug and having a meal sitting together. I never talk about this to any of my family or good friends cause I don't want them to worry - they've got their own lives and things to do and I just want them to be happy.
I always believe that when you take the pain, you will get rewarded with joy. So, sometimes when I feel the heart breaking and it couldn't take anymore pain, I pray for strength. Strength to stand up and carry on the journey of life - for every time you stumble and fall flat, you gonna become tougher than you were before. I reassure myself that God sees the truth but waits, so good times and happiness will be given as the reward for bearing all the pain. I remind myself how lucky I am to be able to eat, sleep and have a healthy happy life. So, I am definitely grateful for what I already have and all I would want is the company of a soul to love and get loved back.
I know I will be alright once I have a girlfriend cause when I need her, she'll be there for me and when she needs me, I'll be there for her too. Yes love is all I need. But who knows when am I gonna find one, I can only hope that maybe 2016 will bring the blessing to me.
I've started to watch more movies since the holiday season started coupla weeks ago and learnt that there is always something you can pick up from a good movie - it can be a positive vibe, a nice idea that you wanna try in your life or wisdom that you can make use if you come across similar challenges. Watching a good movie is like reading a good book, you get so engrossed that you forget about the world around and it's relaxing. So, I might become a movie buff from next year, let's see.
I've recently watched Indecent Proposal and I love the below quote:
Someone once said, "If you want something very badly, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, it was never yours to begin with."
And I love the below dialogue:
Diana: Have I ever told you I love you?
David: No.
Diana: I do.
David: Still?
Diana: Always.
Will write again tomorrow, wish you all a wonderful New Year's Eve!! :)
Take Care :)
